Friday 31 January 2014 at 06:04 am
Hmmmmmm. What to subtitle this one...
"Still Crazy After All These Years"?
"The Jackal In Winter"?
Well, whichever best applies, like a bloated goldfish unwilling to join his brethren in swirly heaven, Professor Doctor Indian Ward Churchill has resurfaced, this time in a lengthy interview with Joshua Frank over at Counterpunch, wherein The Perfesser shares many of his most cherished mindthoughts...
On his lack of publication:
[...]I've invested a huge amount of time and energy doing research and writing since 2005, relatively little of it’s been for publication. Or at least not yet. The upshot is that I’ve got a half-dozen books in varying states of completion and, now that the smoke’s beginning to clear a bit on the legal front, I figure to finish them pretty much one after another, at a fairly regular rate, over the next couple of years or so.
On finally unraveling the mystery of why a "decided majority of the liberal professoriate" are not defending his honor:
All of that nonsense about my having perpetrated “scholarly fraud” and the like has been long since and repeatedly disproven, both in court and elsewhere—that’s a matter of record, easily accessible to anyone who cares to look—but they simply ignore such facts in favor of the convenience embodied in regurgitating the same old lies as a pretext.
On ultimately losing the one dollar (and reinstatement to his phoney-baloney job) awarded him by the Denver jury during his lawsuit against the University of Colorado, Boulder:
After the verdict, in what might best be described desperation maneuver, [university attorney Patrick O'Rourke] wrote up the immunity argument and submitted it as a motion to vacate judgment. We were all laughing about how Patrick had finally gone completely “quazy,” and he himself didn’t seem to think the judge would actually buy into such an off-the-wall premise. In anticipation of the university being ordered to reinstate me, he’d started inquiring about which classes I wanted to teach in the fall so that they could be listed in the regular course catalogue. Things like that.Came the moment, O’Rourke may have been as surprised as anyone else when the judge—Larry Naves, he was chief judge of the Colorado district court in Denver, and assigned himself to preside over the case—not only accepted his argument but simply reformatted his motion and entered it, verbatim, as the ruling.
If repeating the same errors over and over and expecting different results is the first part of the syllogism, then our conclusion must be that The Perfesser himself is, as he so eloquently puts it, "quazy."
Thursday 10 October 2013 at 5:23 pm
Via Leah, Ward Churchill is taking his case to a higher authority, and won't the US be sorry now! (link is to the churchill solidarity network's copy of the petition; here's a copy of it that we made today, in case, well, you know, disappearances).
We're talking nothing less than the Inter-American Commission On Human Rights of the Organization of American States. The petition (73-pages of blah-blah we've all read before) boils down to this: The USA picked on Churchill because (wait... for... it...) he is an Indian! (some would call this "arguing facts not in evidence" but we're inclined to ignore that, if for no other reason but the laffs).
The gang behind all of this includes the Human Rights Research Fund (some no-doubt august international body of crime-fighting ethics scholars, and which has an Atlanta, Georgia PO Box for an address but a Denver, Colorado cell number for a business phone); future ex-wife Natsu "Truthforce" Saito; sorta-stepdaughter Akilah Jenga Kinnison; Churchill legal sock-puppet David Lane; and some guy named Robert Bruce (who apparently imagines his reputation will be enhanced via assocation with this crowd).
Update (31January14), wherein Klaymore comments:
[A]fter a brief (but still too long) review of the IACHR’s website and informational materials:
1) The IACHR is pretty vague on what it really does in the, like, you know, boots-on-the-ground sense that fascist reactionaries like us PB readers usually mean when we say “do.” It’s clear that the IACHR likes using the terms “human rights” and “international law” as often as possible, and often more than once in the same sentence.
2) The IACHR doesn’t seem to actually have any jurisdiction to actually make anybody do anything, but of course we already all knew that and it doesn’t matter since this case is now being resolved in the Republic of Pure Fantasy, where pretty much anything goes as long as you believe.
3) The IACHR’s Petition and Case System Informational Brochure (http://www.oas.org/en/iachr/docs/pdf/HowTo.pdf) provides that a party may file a petition within 6 months of having exhausted domestic judicial remedies. I mention this because, although Churchill has certainly exhausted his domestic remedies, Atty. Saito et al. may have blown their 6-month filing window. The petition purports to have been filed on September 30, which would place it narrowly (yet firmly) within the 6-month window (if memory serves—and according to the petition—SCOTUS dumped Churchill for the last time on April 1, 2013), but the proffered copy is not time-stamped, so there’s no telling whether it was filed on time. It would be mightily amusing if Churchill got bounced out of Pretend Court for missing his filing deadline.
4) The Cases in the Court page of the IACHR’s website (http://www.oas.org/en/iachr/decisions/cases.asp) does not include Churchill’s petition. This fact, of course, means merely what it means in the High Court of the People’s Republic of How Can They be Laughing at Us when We’re so Fucking Serious, neither more nor less.
Finally, on a merely personal and wholly speculative note: The petition states at p. 9 (including footnote 3 thereon) that Petitioner’s Representative Akilah Jenga Kinnison—currently awaiting the results of her bar examination—holds an LLM in Indigenous Peoples Law and Policy. One suspects that this petition was written by her (or her ghostwriter) as a graduation requirement.
Thursday 16 May 2013 at 9:50 pm
[editor: For some reason, the post that follows has disappeared from PB, so we're posting it again. It was originally posted April 2, 2013]
[editor: Hmmmm... and now it's back. very odd. Not real
happy with this "new improved" version of our blog software. Gonna
leave this double posting up for a while, just to be sure.]
Naturally, the fit hit the shan about the same time we were moving out of Colorado. Here's the short step-by-step:
1. Move commenced March 26th. Limited-to-zero internet through April 1.
2. Numerous files on our server were corrupted (cause unknown) and the entire server (along with the dozen or so websites it hosted) required rebuilding from backups. (March 30th-April first).
3. Most special configurations (PB requires one) must be manually rebuilt (we've been at this for two days now).
4. Some important Ward Churchill news finally occurs. (appropriately, on April Fool's Day.)
We'll have all the prettiness re-installed shortly. In the meantime, Leah checks in (yesterday!) with the news of the Supreme Court's "CERTIORARI DENIED" on the Churchill v. The Rest of the World case. For those of us not wise to the ways of the Supremes, this means they are not interested in sitting through even a few minutes of Churchill's legal sock-puppet's bullshit, and have declined to consider his case. Better luck next life, Chief.
Friday 25 January 2013 at 1:46 pm
Leah checks in with a filing of a writ of certiorari
from Ward Churchill's legal sock puppet, which, if we're reading it right, is a request that the US Supreme Court review his case vs. CU.
According to wikipedia,
"A cert petition is voted on at a session of the court called a conference. A conference is a private meeting of the nine Justices by themselves; the public and the Justices' clerks are excluded. If four Justices vote to grant the petition, the case proceeds to the briefing stage; otherwise, the case ends. Except in death penalty cases and other cases in which the Court orders briefing from the respondent, the respondent may, but is not required to, file a response to the cert petition."
And the Supreme Court's site says
"Generally, if a case is considered at a Conference, viewers can expect that the disposition of a case will be announced on an Orders List that will be released at 9:30 a.m. the following Monday."
So it looks like February 18, 2013 is the date for us to watch. (@sspats, et al, to Leah!)
Thursday 20 September 2012 at 4:33 pm
Now that Ward Churchill has—for all intents and purposes—been dismissed from his years-long strutting and fretting across the national stage, it's time to turn our attention to a subject we once touched upon: The Morlock Party. If the Party's motto ("Sic gorgiamus allos subjectatos nunc
") does not hint rather strongly at our core beliefs, then please visit our original post
way back in March 2010 for a run-down. We'll wait.
All caught up now? Good. According to statistics gathered as recently as 2008, nearly 53% of registered voters in the US (probably less once illegal aliens and the dead are removed from the count) self-identified as Eloi, i.e., irrational, mewling dolts proudly unqualified for self-preservation and completely unsuited for anything more productive than providing a laugh-track for Honey Boo Boo.
In short, Eloi are those for whom others are required to provide food, clothing, shelter, and—as we've learned most recently—contraception. The original Morlocks performed this service willingly for the original Eloi (with the exception of the contraceptives, perhaps) because of an unwritten, yet ironclad, quid pro quo
. The Morlocks gave much of value to the Eloi, and in return, the Eloi gave back that one item of value they possessed: Their corporeal selves. Recap: To the Eloi, the Morlocks were generous. To the Morlocks, the Eloi were delicious.
Are you a Morlock? Take this simple True or False quiz:
- In addition to providing for myself and my family, I am required to give some portion of what I earn to strangers.
- I have derived nothing of value from this.
Did you answer True to both statements? Then you have earned your seat at the Morlock table. Because now, you will—at long last—have an opportunity to get back some of what has been taken from you all these years. So go ahead. Pull up a chair. Fill your plate. Feel free to ask for another slice. You paid for it, and this is, quite frankly, your only chance to get some of it back.Remember:
shrug. Meanwhile, Morlocks will
dine.Menu Suggestions for Election Night:
- Debbie Wasserman Schultz-on-a shingle
- Schadenfreude Con Carne
- Grilled Holder on Toast
- Barney Frankfurters
- Spotted Dick Durbin
- Raul Grijalva-Cheese Sandwiches
Tweet us your favorite election night Eloi recipe!
Wednesday 19 September 2012 at 11:09 am
What? You thought we forgot that September 19th is International Talk Like a Pirate Day? (well, yeah. we did. arrrrrrrrrrrr)
So anyway, here's Ward Churchill's legal sock-puppet's latest whining to Westword about his client's recent loss of appeal (heh. never gets old, does it) translated into Pirate:
"I don't have a lot o' hope. We should win, because t' law should be on our side -- and I think it be on our side. So this be our last shot. But t' statistical odds o' t' U.S. Supreme Court takin' this case be pretty slim. Gaaarrrrrrrr!"
Wednesday 12 September 2012 at 09:18 am
The Denver Post
checks in with a tepid editorial
concerning Ward Churchill's loss of appeal (heh again). The editorial makes the rather disingenuous allegation that the DP has always been at war with Eastchurchillia, which might be true of the two or three editorials it has written on the subject, but on its front page and elsewhere, the DP's relationship with the Perfesser (and his assorted minions, toadies, jock-sniffers, and legal sock-puppets we dubbed long ago the Dune Buggy Attack Battalion
) has always resembled that of a fluffer. (ht retired bill)
Incidentally, DP: Your advertising control may indeed go to eleven, but is it really a good idea to peg the meter constantly, forcing every potential new member of your otherwise dwindling audience to wade through wave after wave of pop-unders, auto-plays, and mouse-overs, not to mention the unnecessarily over-scripted menus on every page? Just askin'.
Monday 10 September 2012 at 2:06 pm
Found on discarded Android near Ward Churchill's former Boulder residence:
9:30am: Wake up, note with multiple levels of gratitude that Truthforce has left for work.
10:40am: Wake up again. Get up, pull skivvies out of ass on way to kitchen to see if the coffee's still warm. Warm up cold coffee with some Gentleman Jack.
Noon: Check to see if Leonard Peltier is still in a cage.
12:30pm: Open the day's second deck of Marlboros, light one, then curse, remembering the bitch wants them smoked outside her house. Out on the patio, exhale. Curse again.
1pm-4:30pm: Stare vacantly at computer screen. Occasionally attempt to Friend Benjamin Whitmer again; change Facebook status to "bored, with benefits" then back to "Gonna own that fuckin' university!"
4:58pm: Dress. Gargle with Listerine to cover the smell of cigarettes and cheap bourbon; note for future reference Listerine's alcohol content.
5pm: Greet Truthforce upon her return from the workplace. Pretend her refusal of a welcome-home kiss is coy foreplay.
5:30pm-11:45pm: Nick At Night!
11:46pm-1am: Sleep like a baby. A self-pitying, weeping, drunken sot of a baby.
1:01am-9:30am: Move from sofa to Truthforce's bed, being very careful not to wake her or touch her in any way. Dream of what life was like when it had meaning, purpose, and a point.
Monday 10 September 2012 at 09:08 am
Colorado Supreme Court tells The Perfesser to Go Fish, Ward Churchill's legal sock-puppet David Lane says he'll take the case to the US Supreme Court.
Leah and Retired Bill both send us the link to the Court's decision (pdf).
"The supreme court affirms the court of appeals and the trial court, both of which held that Professor Ward Churchill was not entitled to any of the remedies that he sought."Update:
Apparently busy with more important local news, both the Daily Camera
and the Denver Post
run the AP story, which publishes (purely by chance) the single mildly waffling sentence in the entire 50-page decision that could be construed as pro-Churchill as if it were representative of the rest of the decision.Update II:
The troubled tribbles over at WCSN
are all butthurt with the loss of The Perfesser's appeal (heh), claiming the death of free speech, ad nauseam
(even equating Churchill's loss of his job to Native Americans' loss of their land back in the 1800s), but they fail to note that it was Churchill's legal sock-puppet's signing-off on a pretrial agreement that allowed "quasi-judicial immunity" into the case in the first place. Don't blame the courts, whiners. Blame your crack legal team.Update III:
We'd ask The Perfesser for comment, but his CU email account doesn't seem to be working.... Also (BTW), neither does the website of his little dog Benjie
. [ed. note: GoDaddy got hacked today, so assuming Benjie's site was hosted there, we'll give him the BOD.]Update IV:
The Daily Camera
issues its own report on the ruling
, wherein we also learn that Churchill sold his house in Boulder a couple-three weeks ago and has relocated to Atlanta, where his latest wife, Truthforce
, has yet to be weaned from the public teat. (ht Leah, for whom we have several sacks of unclaimed @sspats waiting)Update V:
Since Churchill got a reported half-million dollars
for his Boulder pied-à-terre
, maybe he can now afford to pay CU that $50,000 in legal expenses
he owes them.
For those who follow these sorts of things, PB has one of those new-fangled tweeter accounts